The Ties That Bind

I think about relationships that have gone beyond friendships today and truly, I am deeply greatful…

I had just given them both a bath. I was busy taking care of other things before dressing them up when I noticed the unusual calm in the room.Unusual because except for early morning baths when they are more often than not woken up, bathing to dressing time for my boys is full of energetic displays of whatever their minds can come up with. Anyways, back to my story… I turned to find them both lying on the bed in their birth day suits and having an intense conversation about how they were going to call spider man for the police. Apparently, the police had done something pretty awful and spider man seemed to be the only one capable of handling the situation. I stared at and listened to them for a while before turning my attention to other things. Hours later, a thought hit me about life and relationships: The ties that bind people together more often than not have nothing to do with blood. This is my personal opinion. The ties that bind have everything to do with building up a relationship with words. Whether it’s talking about mundane things like Spider man and the police or serious issues like the things which trouble us, our hopes, dreams, aspirations, etc. The ties that bind usually begin from conversations. From that first “Hello”, you find yourselves talking more and more, sharing more and more… I remember how I met my Sister of life in our first year at the University. There I was, sitted in the lecture hall, my face buried in a good book while waiting for the lecturer when in comes this amazing girl who sat in front of me and turned around to start a conversation… I was a bit weary of her yet, she refused to let me be – years later, she told me that the reason she pestered me to bring me out of my shell that day was because she tooka look at me and felt a kind of pity for the shy, quiet girl who always sat alone-anyways, all I wanted that day was for her to let me be but she didn’t. We ended up leaving the lecture hall together and that was the beginning of a great friendship that has grown to sisterhood. And yes, this particular tie has nothing to do with blood for you see, while she is from Adamawa state in Nigeria, I am from Plateau State. The Bible says in Proverbs 18:24b: “…but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” I totally agree with this as I also believe that for whatever blood ties you see with great friendships, they did build those friendships. That relationship did not descend on them by reason of been born of the same womb. This is why, when I look at my boys, I pray for them to not just be brothers by blood, but that they be brothers of the heart. I pray for them to have a solid friendship that will span for years and years… That kind of friendship will not begin today for you see, it began yesterday, and the day before that and even way before that. When they sat talking about Spider man and Bat man and other heroes… It began when they started to agree on what to watch on TV and with Oloche asking Echo to wait for him by the door so they could step out of the house together… Yes, the ties that bind often begin this way… with seemingly unserious conversations which turn out to be amazing starting points of great friendships. Zara

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